Most Expensive Gift
“This story happened to me yesterday. My sister and I have birthdays quite close to each other, with only a 6-day difference. Since I’m living abroad, we’ve celebrated together at our parents’ place for the past couple of years. And since it’s their place, they sometimes invite their friends to such events as an extra occasion to reunite with them. This time, they invited one of their friends who is somewhat welcome, but we always hope she will cancel her invite, you know, being polite and all this stupid shit human bags are doing.
She came, obviously with a 1.5-2 hour delay, and gave me a wallet as a present and some random, cheap jewelry for my sister. I didn’t even open the wallet to check it because I was assigned to prepare dinner, and I already have all the wallets I need. Throughout the evening, we listened to her ridiculous stories, especially after the first bottle of wine, which she finished alone. After the second bottle, she started dancing in the middle of the room. We are up for fun, but this time, everyone was tired and half asleep after a long day. So we politely asked all the guests to leave the house and went for a cup of tea to clear our minds after listening to mercantile and sublime stories from an unceremonious lady.
Later, I decided to check the wallet, first of all it was used, visible scratches and marks on the leather, box was a bit damaged on the corners and obviously opened many times. Nothing special, wallet like wallet which you can get in any supermarket for 50 bucks. There were 10 euros in the main section, since there is a weir tradition never gift an empty wallet. I had zero hopes for a present, but this one a bit pissed me off, better do not present anything, than this. Then my father took the wallet to check it, then my sister and my mom.. After checking few sections of it, she found 2000 euros by 500 eur bills. Which as we understood is a stash of mercantile lady’s husband. This pissed me off even more, I will never take a money this way and I told to my parents to return them directly to the husband of this madame.
As was said in one anecdote, hypothetically we have 2000 euros, in reality...
The son asks his father:
- What is “real” and what is “hypothetical”?
- Son, how would I explain to you, let’s take a better look at an example.
- Go to your mother and ask if she would sleep for 1 million. bucks with a black man. The boy returns
- She says she would sleep. “Here, now ask your sister about it.”
- She agrees.
- And now ask your grandfather if he will sleep with a black man for a million dollars.
- Grandfather also agrees.
- You see, hypothetically we have 3 million dollars, but in reality - two prostitutes and a faggot …
Don’t waste your time and energy on such people, time to time better to be alone and without friends than with fake and mean human bags.
Photo by Laura Chouette